August 17, 2010

Skinny Or Bust

January is right around the corner [four & a half months ... eeeek!], which means I turn the big 3-0. Ugh. My goal at the beginning of this year was to lose all the weight that I wanted to lose before my 30th birthday, which is happening much sooner than I would like to think. And I, of course, have not lost ANY of the weight I needed to lose.

Four & a half months isn't a lot of time, and I am quickly realizing that unless I'm the next contestant on The Biggest Loser, it ain't happenin' anytime soon. Not the number that I want to see at least.

The motivation has been there to work out and work hard. The time, however, has not. I spend, on average, 10 hours a day at the office. Most days it's a little more than that. On a good day, I'm to work by 8am [which means up at 6am] & can leave around 6:30 if my work load isn't too bad. Every once in a while, I'm there much later. Which means that to get in my hour work out I either need to be up at 4:30 am [not happening] or go after work. So ... off at 6:30, gym by 7:00. One hour at the gym puts me home around 8:30. Dinner. Bedtime. Personal time? What is that?

It's frustrating because I REALLY want to do this. But I don't have the time. I know that's probably a huge lame ass excuse, but I'm finding that I really do need to find other ways to MAKE the time. As well as find other ways to help with the weight loss journey.

So this week, I started being serious about my calorie counting. It's amazing how quick those calories add up when you eat crap, and how many fruits and veggies you can eat to fill those hungry spots. So, that has been step one. I have a nifty little notebook that stays on my desk all day & in my purse when I'm not in the office. For the record? I am freakin' hungry all. the. time. At least in these beginning stages.

Step two was finding the time to actually work out. The resolution? Bye bye lunch hour. Luckily for me, I have a lot of great workout options due to a) where I work & b) the company I work for. I also found a couple of people who also spend their lunch breaks at one of our various gyms. Which means I will have a buddy. Score! This will also keep me from eating out so often, easing that urge to eat shit food. And when I can? I'll hit the gym a second time after work.

I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

Or so I keep telling myself. I need to KEEP the motivation that I have right now. It's so frustrating to not be where I want to be, to not look the way I want to look/used to look. I need to figure it out.

One baby step at a time.

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