First off, I just want to say a huge THANK YOU to all the people who left comments and sent me emails over the past few days. While I don't necessarily feel better about the issues at hand (mentally, or physically) it makes me feel better that I am not completely alone in what is going on in my head right now. That this is normal, to some extent. It does make me sad, though, that people don't talk about this side of pregnancy more often, as was evident by some of the comments. I hope that if others stumble upon this blog and read that post, that it helps them just a little in what y'all have helped me with.
I do find it unfortunate that feeling this way is a little too taboo to talk about. But it is what it is, and hopefully some of you that are feeling a little down in the dumps [or have in the past] will speak up next time around! I definitely will continue to keep being honest here, because what do I have to lose?
I did forget to mention the insurmountable pain that I continue to have in my hip/pelvic region. It makes doing things on a day to day basis pretty unbearable. Even the little things, like getting out of bed, or shifting position in the middle of the night, makes me want to cry because the pain is so intense. It's hard to enjoy things when you're constantly hating your body for making you feel this way.
Anyways. Moving on.
This week I am solo, as M is out in the field for Army training all week. Typically I don't mind having him gone for a few days, but this week I am missing him something fierce. I blame the hormones that are making me pretty sappy these days. But I'm trying to make the best of my time and actually get some things accomplished. My goal each evening is to do something productive instead of plopping my butt on the couch and watching TV. Monday night I got some needed cleaning done in a couple of room, and last night I tackled the dishes and also started organizing our pantry. A quick inspection a few weeks ago showed me that I have many cans of food that expired like, four years ago. Gross. So last night I started tackling that and got two of the shelves cleaned out and organized. I totally meant to take a "before" photo, but I'm sort of glad I didn't. Embarrassing how unorganized it was!!! Tonight I'll tackle the other two shelves, and then it's on to the cabinets where we also keep some food. My end goal is to create some space for baby stuff. We don't have a lot of room in our kitchen, so any extra space I can create for the coming months is crucial. Hopefully things all work out according to my plan. Can we say nesting?
I also need to work out a couple times a week. I weighed myself for the first time since my last doctors appointment and let me tell you, the result was not pretty. That sweet tooth that I've been having & my overall "I haven't gained any weight so I can eat whatever I want!!!!" attitude is catching up with me. Time to get that in check and get back on the "eat healthy" train. Bye bye, mexican food! [at least for now!]
Other than that, I'm just trying to move along and stay as positive as I can! The kid has been super active the past couple of days and I can actually see my belly move in some spots when he/she gives a good kick. Even with the extra activity, it's not keeping me up at night (yet) but I see that changing soon. I seem to be able to sleep through any movement at night. It's only when I get uncomfortable and need to shift positions that I wake up [which is pretty much every hour ... two hours if I'm lucky!] It's my right hip that kills me the most at night and oddly enough, my shoulder! I also have my follow-up ultrasound in just over two weeks [right before the Christmas weekend] to make sure my placenta has moved up enough to where my midwife is happy.
So that's that, y'all! Happy Tuesday! Here's hoping the rest of the week goes quick!